Yeah, It's a Love-Hate Thing

I already spent 7k++ since the bonus; and it’s been only 5 days. Hmm that’s how little the value of money these days huhh. For me, money, it’s either you do have it or you simply don’t. If you have it, the money can easily vanished like *pooff* anyway. So I splurge, why not? Bagi duit kat budak kecik mcm aku, of course la cpat abes, bukan pikir ape sangat. Few people said to me, “simpan la untuk kawen”, terus je ringan mulut aku tanye balik, “nak kawen ngan sape?” Hahaha. Too often I get those ‘kawen’ questions lately, and I’m only 23, still young maa, kan? Hoshh, saje buat cuak je diorg ni…

Cash rules everything around the world, how ‘bout around me? Last Sunday, after a shopping spree, as all my new buys are lying on the bed, I stared at them and questioned myself – “Honestly Diyana, are you happy now?” One thing for sure, money can’t buy me happiness. But I’m not sad. I can smile and then just feel empty - nothing. Too much of something is bad enough. There’s something missing, internally. Then, I recalled a ‘Pendidikan Islam’ topic taught at secondary school, on ‘Wasatiyah’ (Balanced life/moderation) and being ‘Atawasoot’. Even our body cannot live normally without the benefits of moderation - sleeping, waking, eating, drinking, exercising, in staying away or mixing with others etc. I’m not giving ceramah agama here, tak layak pon nak bagi, but spiritual faith can really nourish your soul y’know. As for me, I know I have a long long way to go from here…I’m (still) partly on the dark side, jahil in putting into practice.

Welcoming the year 2-0-0-8, start your countdown peeps. Time flies. Short review of 2007 - I’m evolving adequately in life, had few ups and downs, met bunch of interesting people, old fellas and new, dengan harapan semua watak2 utama kekal untuk tahun hadapan. I don’t have any new year’s resolution, blerghh, hardly ever had one before.

Hate is usually attached to something/someone that you love, at first you love them, and you are careful to not color outside the lines, but then- it just gets messy. Messes are inevitable.